So, it has been quite a long time since I last posted to this blog. Many things have changed in that time and some important things have stayed way to similar! In the past year, I welcomed my 4th child, my son, Elijah Gabriel to the world...I said good-bye to my wife's grandfather who passed away...watched as Cassidy Grace worked her way through three levels of her Tang Soo Do Mi Guk Kwan class, breaking boards with both her hands and feet along the way...watched as Lily Anne made great strides in gymnastics and then decided to join her older sister in karate and has already earned two stripes on her white belt...I have also watched as Finnegan Michael has started to grow into quite the young man with a new "big boy" haircut, shaved like his daddy, and a very mature decision to take on the challenge of joining the swim team this summer. My wife and I celebrated another anniversary and are poised to ring in a 13th year of marriage very soon! All of these wonderfully emotional things have occurred and have been great blessings to my life.
Unfortunately, the one constant that has not changed very much, is of course....MY WEIGHT!
Interestingly enough, I am doing OK right now with this very frustrating situation. It has taken one year, one month and 22 days to come to the realization that I will never accomplish my goals of losing weight and getting healthy if I constantly berate and condemn myself. I am at a good mental place right now with the choices I am making to make my life more emotionally and physically healthy. I have the support of my amazing wife and wonderful kids...I have a phenomenally patient therapist who genuinely cares about my situation and is always there to give me a positive message and sound advice...I have a loving family and great friends who support me and encourage me and I HAVE A PLAN!
I finally have a long-term plan that will hopefully allow me to maintain a clear focus and drive to achieve my ultimate goals. I am taking things day by day and not looking too far into the future and getting lost in the "what might be", but staying locked into the present and "what actually is"! This new clarity is fueling a motivation in me to be better and to work harder, thus my return to this blog.
I have decided that the blog will now be a place for me to write my thoughts, feelings and ideas and not a place where I feel like I need something to be grandiose or over-the-top with themes and motifs. I am just going to be me and write what is important at the time I feel the need to write. I hope that what I choose to write about will be interesting to others and maybe a little motivational, especially to those, who like me, just need a little bit of simple honesty to get through the rough patches. To the followers of my blog, thank you for being great friends and supporters of me and my life and to the others that may stumble across this and find it interesting, thanks for taking the time to sit and read a spell...Life is just too fast...it pays to slow down and enjoy the little things that make it so great!
Monday, April 22, 2013
Thursday, March 1, 2012
8 oz. of Inspiration
I have tried all kinds of diets in my day. I have done no-carb, low-carb, bars, points, liquids, vegetarian....you name it, I've tried it. In all the different diet plans I have put to the test one thing always seemed to pop up...the miracle measurement of 8 oz. 8 oz. seems to be key in so many aspects of dieting. 8 servings of 8 oz. of water a day, 8 oz. measurements of veggies or rice with a meal, no more than 8 oz. of lean proteins in a day. The ever popular 8 oz. seems to be everywhere. When you check the back of the milk carton it tells you that a serving of the dairy goodness is approx. 8 oz. Drink an 8 oz. serving of V8 and it replaces 2 servings of vegetables for your daily consumption. 8 oz., 1 cup, 1/2 a pound, however you want to look at it, we see this particular measurement in many forms and fashions day in and day out. As a dieter, I have lived through many a time when 8 oz. meant a great deal to me and the plan I was trying to use as a system for improving my health. About a week ago my entire view of the 8 oz. measurement changed and this new opinion has brought me a greater sense of inspiration than any diet plan could ever hope to achieve.
In February of 2011, my wife and I decided that it was time to begin trying to add one more amazing blessing to our family. When we were dating and spoke of our potential family, we always saw the idea of having four children as the ideal number for our future. We are so blessed each day by the three amazing kids we have now that adding the fourth seemed to be the right decision. In the past, we have not had any difficulty in mastering the art of conceiving children. It was the one thing that seemed to come easily for us. This time around would not go has we planned. It took nearly 8 months of trying and many frustrating negative results on various pregnancy tests before on November 23rd my wife woke me with the news that she was finally pregnant. Relief and happiness were the themes of the day and needless to say that Thanksgiving took on an additional sense of poignancy.
Fast forward 3 months and my children and I were heading with my wife for her ultrasound appointment where we would learn the sex of our newest family member. The 5 of us crowded in the little ultrasound room and stared in amazement as the form of our baby filled the monitor. We saw all the features one expects to see in a healthy baby and as each new angle and description of what we were seeing came, the excitement and anticipation rose. As we finally came to the moment of truth the technician waved here magic wand and pronounced that we were having a little boy. What a moment of joy! We were already blessed with two beautiful daughters and a handsome son and now the genders would be even. The coolest part of it all was that when my wife and I discussed our future family, our ideal balance would have been two girls and two boys...who looks into their future and twenty years old and hopes for a specific family dynamic and then is blessed enough to actually see it come to fruition?
As the session was wrapping up and we were trying mightily to control the three overexcited rug rats we had in the room the technician made one last observation. She looked and the measurements of our little boy and told us that he was at the perfect size developmentally and appeared to be measuring about 8 oz. WOW! Now that is the first time in my life that I have ever looked at 8 oz. in such an inspiring way. This little 8 oz. boy reached through my wife's womb, straight into my chest and grabbed my heart for eternity. If that isn't inspiration or motivation enough to get things truly moving in my journey to a healthier life...nothing will ever be. Thanks to my little 8 oz. buddy, my journey is back on track!
In February of 2011, my wife and I decided that it was time to begin trying to add one more amazing blessing to our family. When we were dating and spoke of our potential family, we always saw the idea of having four children as the ideal number for our future. We are so blessed each day by the three amazing kids we have now that adding the fourth seemed to be the right decision. In the past, we have not had any difficulty in mastering the art of conceiving children. It was the one thing that seemed to come easily for us. This time around would not go has we planned. It took nearly 8 months of trying and many frustrating negative results on various pregnancy tests before on November 23rd my wife woke me with the news that she was finally pregnant. Relief and happiness were the themes of the day and needless to say that Thanksgiving took on an additional sense of poignancy.
Fast forward 3 months and my children and I were heading with my wife for her ultrasound appointment where we would learn the sex of our newest family member. The 5 of us crowded in the little ultrasound room and stared in amazement as the form of our baby filled the monitor. We saw all the features one expects to see in a healthy baby and as each new angle and description of what we were seeing came, the excitement and anticipation rose. As we finally came to the moment of truth the technician waved here magic wand and pronounced that we were having a little boy. What a moment of joy! We were already blessed with two beautiful daughters and a handsome son and now the genders would be even. The coolest part of it all was that when my wife and I discussed our future family, our ideal balance would have been two girls and two boys...who looks into their future and twenty years old and hopes for a specific family dynamic and then is blessed enough to actually see it come to fruition?
As the session was wrapping up and we were trying mightily to control the three overexcited rug rats we had in the room the technician made one last observation. She looked and the measurements of our little boy and told us that he was at the perfect size developmentally and appeared to be measuring about 8 oz. WOW! Now that is the first time in my life that I have ever looked at 8 oz. in such an inspiring way. This little 8 oz. boy reached through my wife's womb, straight into my chest and grabbed my heart for eternity. If that isn't inspiration or motivation enough to get things truly moving in my journey to a healthier life...nothing will ever be. Thanks to my little 8 oz. buddy, my journey is back on track!
8 oz. of true inspiration!
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Inspirational Series
I have decided that I am going to begin a series of posts to recognize people in my life that have inspired me by their dedication and determination to achieve a goal they set forth in their lives. These people are extraordinary individuals that I have been privileged to share a part of my life with and who have affected and changed me in many ways. As I continue to work towards overcoming my own challenges and obstacles in life, I look to them for motivation to know that one day I too can achieve my goal of a sustained healthy lifestyle. The people that I choose to chronicle in these posts are not a complete and exhaustive list of the many people who have moved me in my lifetime, but they are a sample of the amazing individuals that I am blessed to know. Many of them are former students that I have taught in school, driver's education or have coached on the tennis court and football field. Nothing pleases me more than to see the young men and women who I have had the opportunity to work with go on to reach the goals they have set for themselves. I may have made a slight impact on them, but they continue to make an immeasurable impact on my life.
Inspirational Post #1 - Joey P.
In the fall of 2004 I was beginning my 4th season as a JV football coach at Garner Magnet High School. Practices had began as usual with many eager young men showing up with the hopes and dreams of wearing the Blue and Gold of the Trojan uniform. The sun was hot and the practices were challenging, but these young men pushed themselves through each and every drill we threw at them. Of course, as the days wore on, several of the boys realized that the rigors and expectations of the life of a football player at a very competitive 4A high school just was not for them and so attrition naturally happened. We were not surprised by the few young men we lost, but we were impressed by those who stuck it out and made it through the entire week of "training camp" and were hanging on as the final cut-down day approached. By far the most difficult aspect of being a high school coach occurs on those occasions when you have to make decisions about which athletes you will keep and which you will unfortunately have to let go. When you have over 100 kids trying out for a team that can suit up a little over 70 players, decisions have to be made. During my time coaching, I was honored and privileged to work under some of the most intelligent and caring coaches I know. Each of them took a very serious and personal interest in the young men who worked so hard during those early practices and I can personally attest that on the day when cuts had to be made, it was something that they neither looked forward to nor took lightly.
On this particular cut day, I had been discussing several of the players that were on the "bubble" with our Head JV Coach. We were in agreement for the most part about the guys that would not be returning for the start of regular practice and were in the midst of finalizing the list when I noticed one name in particular that I was a little surprised to see on the list of potential cuts. At the time I was coaching Linebackers and working with the special teams unit, specifically the kickers, punters and long snappers. I had played center and long snapper in high school and so I used the knowledge I had to work with the guys who had potential to develop before they reached Varsity. Joey ended up working with my Linebackers group during defensive drills and this young man was by no means a "blue chipper", but he was a kid who had shown up early to practice and stayed late each day asking questions and wanting to know what he needed to do to be better. He never quit during the drills and willed himself to never finish last in any of the running or conditioning. He was not a big kid and he needed a lot of work in the weight room to get his body to match his spirit, but what a spirit. I had never met a kid who so desperately wanted to be a Trojan football player. He wasn't the fastest or the most talented, but he had a heart the size of the stadium. He took beating after beating and still kept coming. He was an intelligent kid and learned quickly what he needed to do to make himself better. He was respectful, attentive and humble...I liked him from the very beginning. After practice one day, I was talking with some of the kids and Joey approached me with more questions about what he could do to improve. Now in all honesty, as a linebacker, he was not going to make the cut, however I didn't want to say this to him, so I gave him some more advice. He then asked me if at the next practice he could come and work with the punt snappers during special teams practice. I inquired whether or not he had snapped before and he said that he had. I told him sure and went away not expecting a whole lot. The next day at practice when we broke into special teams groups, Joey came over and prepared to snap the ball. His initial attempt did not go so well. He bounced the ball short of the punter. I wasn't impressed and almost sent him away, but he asked for a second chance. I said OK and made a couple of suggestions about his technique. His second attempt was vastly improved and each additional attempt got better and better, There was something about the way he listened and put the suggestions into practice that I found intriguing. The more he snapped the better he got. I was very pleased. We had one returning snapper from the previous year, but it never hurts to have two! We continued to work on snapping during and after practice. He was truly a machine. He wanted to snap over and over until he got it just right. He began running some of the drills in practice and was doing a great job, so on that day I looked at the cuts list, I was truly surprised to see him on it. I approached the head coach and asked him about the decision and he said he felt that Joey just wasn't ready to play for the team as a linebacker and that it had been a tough decision. I respectfully asked him to reconsider based on the fact that Joey was really doing a great job long snapping. I told him it wouldn't hurt to have an extra snapper on the roster in case of injury. I guess my request was convincing enough that the coach decided to let Joey stay on the roster. He even told him to thank me for pleading his case....trust me, I did not need the thanks...the boy had earned his spot in my opinion and I was glad to see him make the cut. As the season wore on Joey worked tirelessly as a member of the scout defensive team helping prepare the staring offensive players for each game. He also continued to improve as a linebacker and when given the opportunities he would do a good job in the game. My favorite memory of that season came in the fourth quarter of a game we were winning late in the season. I had put some of my subs in to close out the game and for fun, I called an inside blitz for Joey who was playing strong side linebacker. It was fun to give the kids who worked so hard each week the opportunity to make plays when they got the chance in the games. Boy did Joey make the most of his opportunity. As the center hiked the ball, Joey burst through the line of scrimmage and attacked the opposing quarterback with a ferocity I had not seen in him at all that year. He made a textbook move to shiver past the linemen and took the quarterback to the ground with force and determination. I had never been more excited or proud of a player. Here was a kid who was on the cusp of being cut and he had just made the most exciting play in football...a quarterback sack. I think I jumped 10 feet in the air and literally picked him up when he came to the sidelines. It was a great moment!
That season ended and Joey ended up playing tennis for me later in the year and he gave just as much effort on the tennis court as he had on the football field. When the next season rolled around, there was no doubt that Joey was going to make the team...and he did as a starting offensive linemen. I missed having him around during linebacker practice, but still got the opportunity to work with him as the starting long snapper for our special teams. Joey went on to have a very successful career as an offensive lineman for the Varsity Football team and I actually left coaching football to take on the coaching responsibilities of our school's women's tennis program. Joey did come back to play tennis for me during his senior year and when he graduated from high school he went on to pursue his academic career at NC State University. We have remained close over the years and it was with great pride and excitement that I received some pretty incredible news concerning Joey. You see, even though Joey graduated high school and went off to college, he never got rid of that desire to play football. He had made the dream of playing for the Garner Trojans become a reality through his hard work and dedication and as he spent the first few years of his college life focused on his academics, he continued to stoke that fire to make another one of his lifelong dreams come true. Joey continued practicing and developing his long snapping abilities and pushed himself to become truly the best he could be and then he took that hard work and dedication and put it to good use. As the preparations for the 2011-12 NC State football season began, Joey took his big heart and limitless passion with him as he attended walk-on tryouts for the Wolfpack's long-snapper position. He put that same focus and dedication into his tryouts just like I had seen him do so many days on that practice field during his Freshman year at GMHS. As Joey was trying out for the NCSU football team, I was continuing to teach and coach tennis at GMHS alongside Joey's mother who is an amazing teacher in our theater arts department. One day as I was working at school, Ms. P paid me a visit in my classroom to share some amazing news. She looked me in the eyes and with much pride informed me that that little Freshman football player that I once stood up for and kept from being cut had just made the NCSU football team as a walk-on long snapper. Tears filled my eyes and joy and pride filled my heart as I gave my friend a great big hug. What an achievement. Joey took a dream he had and did not settle until he reached his goal. I was so excited as earlier in the year I went with my two little girls to the NCSU player meet and greet. I walked around the stadium and waited in line to see the kid I knew so well. I cried as I hugged him and told him how proud I was of his accomplishment and then got him to sign my hat and took several pictures together before he had to return to his responsibilities.
Joey is such an inspiration to me. His hard work and dedication led him to reach his dream. His commitment over the years and his desire to succeed opened doors for him and he took advantage of his opportunity. What a wonderful role model. It appears that I am now the student and Joey is the teacher. Congratulations Joey....and thanks for the inspiration.
Inspirational Post #1 - Joey P.
In the fall of 2004 I was beginning my 4th season as a JV football coach at Garner Magnet High School. Practices had began as usual with many eager young men showing up with the hopes and dreams of wearing the Blue and Gold of the Trojan uniform. The sun was hot and the practices were challenging, but these young men pushed themselves through each and every drill we threw at them. Of course, as the days wore on, several of the boys realized that the rigors and expectations of the life of a football player at a very competitive 4A high school just was not for them and so attrition naturally happened. We were not surprised by the few young men we lost, but we were impressed by those who stuck it out and made it through the entire week of "training camp" and were hanging on as the final cut-down day approached. By far the most difficult aspect of being a high school coach occurs on those occasions when you have to make decisions about which athletes you will keep and which you will unfortunately have to let go. When you have over 100 kids trying out for a team that can suit up a little over 70 players, decisions have to be made. During my time coaching, I was honored and privileged to work under some of the most intelligent and caring coaches I know. Each of them took a very serious and personal interest in the young men who worked so hard during those early practices and I can personally attest that on the day when cuts had to be made, it was something that they neither looked forward to nor took lightly.
On this particular cut day, I had been discussing several of the players that were on the "bubble" with our Head JV Coach. We were in agreement for the most part about the guys that would not be returning for the start of regular practice and were in the midst of finalizing the list when I noticed one name in particular that I was a little surprised to see on the list of potential cuts. At the time I was coaching Linebackers and working with the special teams unit, specifically the kickers, punters and long snappers. I had played center and long snapper in high school and so I used the knowledge I had to work with the guys who had potential to develop before they reached Varsity. Joey ended up working with my Linebackers group during defensive drills and this young man was by no means a "blue chipper", but he was a kid who had shown up early to practice and stayed late each day asking questions and wanting to know what he needed to do to be better. He never quit during the drills and willed himself to never finish last in any of the running or conditioning. He was not a big kid and he needed a lot of work in the weight room to get his body to match his spirit, but what a spirit. I had never met a kid who so desperately wanted to be a Trojan football player. He wasn't the fastest or the most talented, but he had a heart the size of the stadium. He took beating after beating and still kept coming. He was an intelligent kid and learned quickly what he needed to do to make himself better. He was respectful, attentive and humble...I liked him from the very beginning. After practice one day, I was talking with some of the kids and Joey approached me with more questions about what he could do to improve. Now in all honesty, as a linebacker, he was not going to make the cut, however I didn't want to say this to him, so I gave him some more advice. He then asked me if at the next practice he could come and work with the punt snappers during special teams practice. I inquired whether or not he had snapped before and he said that he had. I told him sure and went away not expecting a whole lot. The next day at practice when we broke into special teams groups, Joey came over and prepared to snap the ball. His initial attempt did not go so well. He bounced the ball short of the punter. I wasn't impressed and almost sent him away, but he asked for a second chance. I said OK and made a couple of suggestions about his technique. His second attempt was vastly improved and each additional attempt got better and better, There was something about the way he listened and put the suggestions into practice that I found intriguing. The more he snapped the better he got. I was very pleased. We had one returning snapper from the previous year, but it never hurts to have two! We continued to work on snapping during and after practice. He was truly a machine. He wanted to snap over and over until he got it just right. He began running some of the drills in practice and was doing a great job, so on that day I looked at the cuts list, I was truly surprised to see him on it. I approached the head coach and asked him about the decision and he said he felt that Joey just wasn't ready to play for the team as a linebacker and that it had been a tough decision. I respectfully asked him to reconsider based on the fact that Joey was really doing a great job long snapping. I told him it wouldn't hurt to have an extra snapper on the roster in case of injury. I guess my request was convincing enough that the coach decided to let Joey stay on the roster. He even told him to thank me for pleading his case....trust me, I did not need the thanks...the boy had earned his spot in my opinion and I was glad to see him make the cut. As the season wore on Joey worked tirelessly as a member of the scout defensive team helping prepare the staring offensive players for each game. He also continued to improve as a linebacker and when given the opportunities he would do a good job in the game. My favorite memory of that season came in the fourth quarter of a game we were winning late in the season. I had put some of my subs in to close out the game and for fun, I called an inside blitz for Joey who was playing strong side linebacker. It was fun to give the kids who worked so hard each week the opportunity to make plays when they got the chance in the games. Boy did Joey make the most of his opportunity. As the center hiked the ball, Joey burst through the line of scrimmage and attacked the opposing quarterback with a ferocity I had not seen in him at all that year. He made a textbook move to shiver past the linemen and took the quarterback to the ground with force and determination. I had never been more excited or proud of a player. Here was a kid who was on the cusp of being cut and he had just made the most exciting play in football...a quarterback sack. I think I jumped 10 feet in the air and literally picked him up when he came to the sidelines. It was a great moment!
That season ended and Joey ended up playing tennis for me later in the year and he gave just as much effort on the tennis court as he had on the football field. When the next season rolled around, there was no doubt that Joey was going to make the team...and he did as a starting offensive linemen. I missed having him around during linebacker practice, but still got the opportunity to work with him as the starting long snapper for our special teams. Joey went on to have a very successful career as an offensive lineman for the Varsity Football team and I actually left coaching football to take on the coaching responsibilities of our school's women's tennis program. Joey did come back to play tennis for me during his senior year and when he graduated from high school he went on to pursue his academic career at NC State University. We have remained close over the years and it was with great pride and excitement that I received some pretty incredible news concerning Joey. You see, even though Joey graduated high school and went off to college, he never got rid of that desire to play football. He had made the dream of playing for the Garner Trojans become a reality through his hard work and dedication and as he spent the first few years of his college life focused on his academics, he continued to stoke that fire to make another one of his lifelong dreams come true. Joey continued practicing and developing his long snapping abilities and pushed himself to become truly the best he could be and then he took that hard work and dedication and put it to good use. As the preparations for the 2011-12 NC State football season began, Joey took his big heart and limitless passion with him as he attended walk-on tryouts for the Wolfpack's long-snapper position. He put that same focus and dedication into his tryouts just like I had seen him do so many days on that practice field during his Freshman year at GMHS. As Joey was trying out for the NCSU football team, I was continuing to teach and coach tennis at GMHS alongside Joey's mother who is an amazing teacher in our theater arts department. One day as I was working at school, Ms. P paid me a visit in my classroom to share some amazing news. She looked me in the eyes and with much pride informed me that that little Freshman football player that I once stood up for and kept from being cut had just made the NCSU football team as a walk-on long snapper. Tears filled my eyes and joy and pride filled my heart as I gave my friend a great big hug. What an achievement. Joey took a dream he had and did not settle until he reached his goal. I was so excited as earlier in the year I went with my two little girls to the NCSU player meet and greet. I walked around the stadium and waited in line to see the kid I knew so well. I cried as I hugged him and told him how proud I was of his accomplishment and then got him to sign my hat and took several pictures together before he had to return to his responsibilities.
Joey is such an inspiration to me. His hard work and dedication led him to reach his dream. His commitment over the years and his desire to succeed opened doors for him and he took advantage of his opportunity. What a wonderful role model. It appears that I am now the student and Joey is the teacher. Congratulations Joey....and thanks for the inspiration.
Monday, January 30, 2012
A Letter to Me....
I got this letter from an old friend who I haven't seen lately and it inspired me to get back to writing. I have decided to post it as the relaunch of my blogging effort!
Dear Joey,
I was so excited when I saw you the other day, it seems like forever since we have had a chance to talk and catch up. I wish we could have had more time so I thought I would drop you an old fashioned letter to take the opportunity to do just that...catch up. Life appears to be treating you well. Your wife is beautiful and your three kids are so adorable. Just watching them play together and have so much fun made me feel young again. I was glad to hear that you are still teaching and coaching. Those are such rewarding endeavors and give you the great opportunity to work and help young people. I know it can be a trying profession, but stick with it...you are doing so much good by simply being a positive role model for those kids. I saw on Facebook that your boys tennis team won the conference championship last season and that your girls had another strong season as well. Way to go! I know tennis is something that you truly love and that you have devoted so much time to those programs. Seeing that hard work pay off must be encouraging. Like I said life appears to be great. I did want to take a moment to check about how the weight loss was going. I knew you were hoping to get into a consistent pattern of working out and eating right...just didn't know how that was progressing. I know you can do it if you really put your full effort into it...that sounds a little corny and cliche, but it is true. Look at what you have accomplished when you have been focused. You went to ECU on a full scholarship. You have been named tennis Coach of the Year 7 times. You earned your Masters in Education and your National Board Certification. You run a successful Driver's Ed program and have been a finalist for Teacher of the Year at your school. You have an amazing family, house and are a dedicated Christian. You can do anything you set your mind to....when you are focused. My prayer for you is to stay focused. Trust yourself and the people around you. They love you and are there for you. You are not alone and you don't have to face this challenge in that way. I will be here for you and will strive to encourage you to do your very best. You can WIN...I BELIEVE IN YOU! So, now is the time to go out and take care of this once and for all. You have the knowledge and skills, you just need the will and desire to stick to the path. The journey will me long and difficult, but that is what makes it so important. Take care of yourself and push onward and upward. I love you my friend and I can't wait to see you again!
Lovingly Yours,
JOEY
Funny how life is...just when you think that you have everything figured out and all the pieces in place to make a change, you realize that the only piece of the puzzle that is missing...is YOU! Here's to taking another first step...I have to succeed...my life depends on it!
Dear Joey,
I was so excited when I saw you the other day, it seems like forever since we have had a chance to talk and catch up. I wish we could have had more time so I thought I would drop you an old fashioned letter to take the opportunity to do just that...catch up. Life appears to be treating you well. Your wife is beautiful and your three kids are so adorable. Just watching them play together and have so much fun made me feel young again. I was glad to hear that you are still teaching and coaching. Those are such rewarding endeavors and give you the great opportunity to work and help young people. I know it can be a trying profession, but stick with it...you are doing so much good by simply being a positive role model for those kids. I saw on Facebook that your boys tennis team won the conference championship last season and that your girls had another strong season as well. Way to go! I know tennis is something that you truly love and that you have devoted so much time to those programs. Seeing that hard work pay off must be encouraging. Like I said life appears to be great. I did want to take a moment to check about how the weight loss was going. I knew you were hoping to get into a consistent pattern of working out and eating right...just didn't know how that was progressing. I know you can do it if you really put your full effort into it...that sounds a little corny and cliche, but it is true. Look at what you have accomplished when you have been focused. You went to ECU on a full scholarship. You have been named tennis Coach of the Year 7 times. You earned your Masters in Education and your National Board Certification. You run a successful Driver's Ed program and have been a finalist for Teacher of the Year at your school. You have an amazing family, house and are a dedicated Christian. You can do anything you set your mind to....when you are focused. My prayer for you is to stay focused. Trust yourself and the people around you. They love you and are there for you. You are not alone and you don't have to face this challenge in that way. I will be here for you and will strive to encourage you to do your very best. You can WIN...I BELIEVE IN YOU! So, now is the time to go out and take care of this once and for all. You have the knowledge and skills, you just need the will and desire to stick to the path. The journey will me long and difficult, but that is what makes it so important. Take care of yourself and push onward and upward. I love you my friend and I can't wait to see you again!
Lovingly Yours,
JOEY
Funny how life is...just when you think that you have everything figured out and all the pieces in place to make a change, you realize that the only piece of the puzzle that is missing...is YOU! Here's to taking another first step...I have to succeed...my life depends on it!
Thursday, August 11, 2011
RESPECT...
Throughout the past week at tennis practice, I have been running with the girls. Each day I require them to do conditioning drills before and after practice. Even when the temperatures reach the 100s, they give their all and complete the challenges I lay before them. They push themselves to finish and make themselves better. Since I have been completing the running with them, I have taken on a much greater respect for what I make them do each day. They really are amazing girls and I am so proud to be their coach. My legs are sore, but I am getting more motivated each time they ask..."Coach, aren't you going to run with us?" Who could say no...
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Actions Speak Louder than Words...
I am not a doer.......
I love to talk, discuss, intellectualize and rationalize lots of things in my life. I spend large amounts of time discussing and planning my next big thing and then feel very satisfied with the idea, yet never move on to making things happen. Don't get me wrong...I work hard and take care of responsibilities at home and work, but I don't make things happen in my life when it comes to my hopes and dreams. I need to change that! I want to be a doer...I want to make my hopes become realities and my ideas take on some semblance of substance. If I can start making myself be more proactive then I can begin to enjoy/reap the benefits of all of my wonderful plans and ideas.
So, with this being said, I am in the process of making some things happen. First, I am organizing a family meal night with my in-laws so that we can spend more quality time together and focus our hearts and minds around good fellowship and God's Word. Second, I am reconnecting with some treasured friends. These are guys who meant a great deal to me growing up and played a significant role in my life. We live just a few miles from each other and sometimes go months without talking. We are now planning on meeting at least once a month to play tennis, enjoy a meal or just hang out. Finally, I am rearranging my schedule for my after school commitments to be a more effective teacher and faculty member at my school. I am creating a study hall for my tennis players and opening up myself to be more available to help students in need. I hope that by starting with a few important decisions and creating an environment of doing and not just talking, I will be able to continue to build my confidence and self-respect, which will lead to a more fulfilling,successful and healthy lifestyle.
Now it is time to back up my words with my actions!
I love to talk, discuss, intellectualize and rationalize lots of things in my life. I spend large amounts of time discussing and planning my next big thing and then feel very satisfied with the idea, yet never move on to making things happen. Don't get me wrong...I work hard and take care of responsibilities at home and work, but I don't make things happen in my life when it comes to my hopes and dreams. I need to change that! I want to be a doer...I want to make my hopes become realities and my ideas take on some semblance of substance. If I can start making myself be more proactive then I can begin to enjoy/reap the benefits of all of my wonderful plans and ideas.
So, with this being said, I am in the process of making some things happen. First, I am organizing a family meal night with my in-laws so that we can spend more quality time together and focus our hearts and minds around good fellowship and God's Word. Second, I am reconnecting with some treasured friends. These are guys who meant a great deal to me growing up and played a significant role in my life. We live just a few miles from each other and sometimes go months without talking. We are now planning on meeting at least once a month to play tennis, enjoy a meal or just hang out. Finally, I am rearranging my schedule for my after school commitments to be a more effective teacher and faculty member at my school. I am creating a study hall for my tennis players and opening up myself to be more available to help students in need. I hope that by starting with a few important decisions and creating an environment of doing and not just talking, I will be able to continue to build my confidence and self-respect, which will lead to a more fulfilling,successful and healthy lifestyle.
Now it is time to back up my words with my actions!
Monday, July 18, 2011
Perspective and Redirection!
The past two weeks have been filled with heartache and joy! Two weeks ago, I spent most of my time each day helping my family deal with the loss of my wife's grandmother. We took a few trips up and down the highway to attend services and spend much needed time with family. Last week, I went on an annual beach trip with my wife's family. It was a great time to get away and spend some focused quality time with my family. Getting to be with my wife, kids and my in-laws after the previous week's emotional roller coaster was such a blessing. Relaxing at the beach, sharing stories, laughter and sweet fellowship really healed many things in my heart.
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I do have one small victory to report....I made it through the past two weeks of crazy schedules and beach vacation and did not gain any weight. The simple fact that I was able to be out of my comfort zone and controlled environment and not go crazy with putting in the pounds was pleasing to see today. One thing I need to take advantage of and work on this week is getting to the gym.
So, next Monday I will post my BodyMedia stats for the week and will include something to work on and a victory.
I also had the opportunity to spend some time on our way home with my Mom, Step dad, Twin Brother and various other members of my family. I especially enjoyed the time I got to spend fishing on my Mom's dock with my twin brother. It is in those special alone times that I am reminded how much I love and miss him. Our connection is so very special and it hurts more than I realize not seeing him more often. While we fished, something that our MeMaw taught us to do many years ago, we had some time to talk with each other about what is important in life. It was during this talk that I came to some conclusions and decisions about my life. - My life is great....I have an amazing family, wonderful friends and abundance from God that is truly remarkable.
- I love myself...yes, there are many things about myself that I hope to improve and make even better, but genuinely, I love who I am. I spend entirely too much time focusing on the negative aspects of myself and not enough time appreciating the person I am.
- I care way too much about money...I waste so much time worried about finances and how good of a job I am doing as a provider for my family that I make myself either worried and/or frustrated to a point where I am not happy about anything.
- I am a hard worker....I dedicate myself to the many jobs I do and I try to be the best I possibly can be.
- I focus entirely too much on weight loss and not enough time on being healthy...my brother helped me regain perspective about what I really want to accomplish in my physical life, I want to be healthy. I always talk about how I want to avoid the "fad diets" and the "quick fixes", yet I basically create my own diets and quick fixes by pushing to have immediate and mind-blowing results each time I plan a new weight loss goal. I need to focus on slow and steady and look for real results that last.
I do have one small victory to report....I made it through the past two weeks of crazy schedules and beach vacation and did not gain any weight. The simple fact that I was able to be out of my comfort zone and controlled environment and not go crazy with putting in the pounds was pleasing to see today. One thing I need to take advantage of and work on this week is getting to the gym.
So, next Monday I will post my BodyMedia stats for the week and will include something to work on and a victory.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Two steps forward....Three steps back!
Today I feel like the old me...someone who is easily frustrated, irritated and unwilling to compromise. I feel that I have made progress in the past year, however, I do notice that old personalty traits do pop up from time to time and drive me a little bonkers! I know I am suppose to roll with the moments, recognize them, analyze them and deal with them...today has not been one of those days. Maybe it has to do with the fatigue of the week...both physically and emotionally...or maybe I am not as strong and collected as I have convinced myself that I am. Maybe I am weak....in body and mind! I am not losing weight like I should and I have been more resentful of others lately. Instead of enjoying the successes that I have...limited as they seem right now, I am being driven by the utter failure that my weight loss and personality changes are making me feel right now. Yes, I realize I am having a huge pity party right now, but it is what it is! Hopefully, a week away from things and spending some much needed time with my family will help me reposition my perspective. The intelligent and well-adjusted part of me knows that this is just an emotional reaction to a stressful situation and that everything will level out and I will learn from today, but the less evolved portion of my physche just doesn't seem to care! Guess I should try and take another two steps forward......I hate this feeling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In Remembrance of MeMa!
As you probably have noticed...I did not post an update this week. The main reason for this comes from the fact that I have spent much of the past week helping my wife and our family deal with the loss of her grandmother. At 93 years old, Mema was an amazing lady. I loved her very much and I will miss her dearly. When I met her 15 years ago, I had just lost all four of my grandparents. They each passed away within 9 months of each other. Mema filled a much needed hole in my life and I loved the opportunities I would get at Thanksgiving and Christmas to sit and talk with her about history, literature and her beloved Savannah, Ga. These are moments that I will never forget.
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So, with all the running around between here and Virginia, I did not get very productive or complete readings from my BodyMedia system. I also missed a complete evening of sleep readings because my middle child became sick and I needed to take care of her. I removed the armband to get her cleaned up in the shower and forgot to put it back on for the evening. With so much missing data, I felt that I would not have a complete list of viable data to make a post that would truly matter.
I plan on posting again once we return from our beach trip next week.
On a separate note....
To honor the memory of my wife's grandmother, I wrote a poem. I was not able to share it at her memorial service, so I thought I would share it on the blog. I love and miss MeMa very much. She was an incredible lady and someone who touched my life abundantly!
Mema and Gran: Happily Married for 70 Years!
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Mema discussing history and other family secrets with me at Thanksgiving!
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Dancing with Mema at my wedding!
So, with all the running around between here and Virginia, I did not get very productive or complete readings from my BodyMedia system. I also missed a complete evening of sleep readings because my middle child became sick and I needed to take care of her. I removed the armband to get her cleaned up in the shower and forgot to put it back on for the evening. With so much missing data, I felt that I would not have a complete list of viable data to make a post that would truly matter.
I plan on posting again once we return from our beach trip next week.
On a separate note....
To honor the memory of my wife's grandmother, I wrote a poem. I was not able to share it at her memorial service, so I thought I would share it on the blog. I love and miss MeMa very much. She was an incredible lady and someone who touched my life abundantly!
ELEGANCE
Sun rises over a Savannah skyline,
cascading its golden fingertips across Georgia peaches
and all the beauty of God's wondrous creation.
The soft coo of a child's laugh,
the warm comfort of a Mother's embrace.
The spirit of a Warrior, with the grace of a Lady.
A distinct Southern drawl
from the mouth of a Southern Belle
filled with wisdom, history and love.
The embrace of a friendship
turned to love, turned to devotion,
turned to eternity!
Brightness in a smile and the countenance of joy
shining through the darkness
in a world filled with pain.
Elegance personified
in the body of a woman,
walking in the love of God towards others.
Sunset on a Richmond landscape
withdrawing its golden fingertips from the
extraordinary gift of a life not soon forgotten.
Even asleep,
warming the hearts and souls of her beloved,
Even asleep,
radiating light throughout the darkness!
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Weight Update and Food Forum
Today was my first official weigh-in for the Summer Challenge.....DRUM ROLL PLEASE.....I lost 1 pound! I could look at the idea of losing 1 pound as a failure for week one, but I choose instead to be happy with the fact that I am one pound lighter this week than I was last week. It is not the most exciting news to report and I know that I most definitely can do a much better and more consistent job during the week, yet if I truly want to focus on the long term aspects of this life choice, then I choose to be happy with one pound...not satisfied....happy! Next week starts today!
Now for something new....I would like to create a forum for people to share their healthy culinary ideas about specific food topics each week. I will begin by sharing a story and a meal idea I prepared and then open the floor for questions/comments/discussion/idea sharing etc... Please feel free to jump in and post/share your thoughts about the weekly topic.
This Week's Topic: SALMON
Last week, I had the opportunity to work with one of my closest friends in the kitchen at the conference center she runs and it was a blast. Getting back in the kitchen grind, even on a small scale, really got my culinary juices flowing. I love cooking! It is one of my greatest passions and I relish the opportunities I have to reclaim some of the old feelings I use to get when I worked in numerous seafood restaurants in high school and college. After cooking for others all week, I had the opportunity to cook for my favorite customers...my family. I put together a Salmon dish that I was very excited about and really enjoyed.
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Now for something new....I would like to create a forum for people to share their healthy culinary ideas about specific food topics each week. I will begin by sharing a story and a meal idea I prepared and then open the floor for questions/comments/discussion/idea sharing etc... Please feel free to jump in and post/share your thoughts about the weekly topic.
This Week's Topic: SALMON
Last week, I had the opportunity to work with one of my closest friends in the kitchen at the conference center she runs and it was a blast. Getting back in the kitchen grind, even on a small scale, really got my culinary juices flowing. I love cooking! It is one of my greatest passions and I relish the opportunities I have to reclaim some of the old feelings I use to get when I worked in numerous seafood restaurants in high school and college. After cooking for others all week, I had the opportunity to cook for my favorite customers...my family. I put together a Salmon dish that I was very excited about and really enjoyed.
The dish included:
Serrano Lime Baked Salmon
Cajun Sauteed Shrimp
Homemade Panko Crusted Okra
Curry Ginger Mushrooms
Corn on the Cob
Sauteed Broccoli
Whole Wheat Dinner Rolls
The Salmon was the focal point of the dish. I seasoned it with salt, pepper, mango lime seafood seasoning and baked it with sliced Serrano peppers (seeds included) and lime twists. The flavor of the lime and chili pepper infused nicely with the fish and was not overpowering to the palate. I really like the combination of citrus and chili when cooking seafood of any kind, but especially on a meaty fish like Salmon. The texture of the fish holds up nicely with the boldness of the flavor combinations.
What are some of your SALMON ideas?
Monday, June 27, 2011
"BodyMedia" Week One Wrap-Up: (June 21 - 27, 2011)
I completed my first official week with the BodyMedia FIT Armband system and I must say that I thoroughly enjoy it. I have been intrigued by the functionality of the system and find myself very interested to see what comes up when I download my daily totals. I particularly like the sleep duration assessment. It is interesting to see how long and at what percentage I get real sleep each night. There are a few things I have found during the week that I will need to keep an eye on to see how truly accurate the data that is being processed turns out to be. First, I have been imputing my caloric intake each day, or as close an approximation as I have been able to figure it during the week and have kept an eye on the system's calculations for caloric deficit numbers. According to the numbers for this week, I should be at around an 11,440 calorie deficit mark. This deficit would indicate a 3 pound weight loss for the week...I shall see tomorrow when I make my official weigh-in. If the numbers do not add up, I will keep a track of the discrepancies over the first few weeks and see where the differences are falling. As far as the other categories, I feel like I am getting a pretty good indicator of my total steps, activity rate and sleep percentage. I realize that the numbers may not be completely perfect, but the data is at least a step in the right direction to see when I am most active and how that activity translates to my overall daily routines. One thing that keeps the data from being entirely correct is the fact that the armband is not waterproof, so I do not get credited for any steps or activity minutes when I am playing at the pool with the kids. Again, I am not that concerned with the missing data, because any information is helpful.
So, for my first post I will give my totals and averages for Total Steps, Activity Rate (moderate to vigorous activity) and Sleep Duration/Percentage. I am also including a product endorsement, completely personal, with no reimbursement being thrown my way. I just want to include some things that I am finding to be helpful in my continuous journey to a healthful life. Please feel free to include products that you enjoy and find beneficial. Thanks again for the support and I will be back tomorrow with a weight update and a dinner discussion....topic: SALMON!
BodyMedia Week One Stats: (6/21/11 - 6/27/11)
Total Steps: 50,167
Average Daily Steps: 7,167
Total Activity Rate: 307 mins.
Average Daily Activity Rate: 44 mins.
Total Sleep Duration: 42 hrs. 44 mins
Nightly Sleep Duration Average: 6 hrs. 6 mins
Weekly Sleep Percentage Average: 86%
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Product Endorsement:
UNCLE SAM: Toasted Whole Wheat Berry Flakes & Flaxseed
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I have only tried the "Original" version of the cereal, but it is a great find. First, it has 4 ingredients: Whole Wheat Kernels, Whole Flaxseed, Salt, Barley Malt. Second, it is loaded with nutrients: 190 calories, 5g fat, 0.5g sat. fat, 10g fiber, 7g protein and less than 1g sugar per 3/4 cup serving. Third, it is affordable: $2.15 a box (@ Wal-Mart). Finally, it is full of Omega-3 Fatty Acids. I eat a bowl drizzled with honey in the morning and find it tasty and fulfilling. For more info visit http://www.attunefoods.com/
So, for my first post I will give my totals and averages for Total Steps, Activity Rate (moderate to vigorous activity) and Sleep Duration/Percentage. I am also including a product endorsement, completely personal, with no reimbursement being thrown my way. I just want to include some things that I am finding to be helpful in my continuous journey to a healthful life. Please feel free to include products that you enjoy and find beneficial. Thanks again for the support and I will be back tomorrow with a weight update and a dinner discussion....topic: SALMON!
BodyMedia Week One Stats: (6/21/11 - 6/27/11)
Total Steps: 50,167
Average Daily Steps: 7,167
Total Activity Rate: 307 mins.
Average Daily Activity Rate: 44 mins.
Total Sleep Duration: 42 hrs. 44 mins
Nightly Sleep Duration Average: 6 hrs. 6 mins
Weekly Sleep Percentage Average: 86%
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Product Endorsement:
UNCLE SAM: Toasted Whole Wheat Berry Flakes & Flaxseed
Monday, June 20, 2011
The "BodyMedia" Summer Challenge
Hello everyone.....I am finally back. I am sorry that my hiatus was longer than it should have been, but life does sometimes take over and the last few weeks have been filled with lots of closures and transitions. Another school year ended, my 12th to be exact and I said goodbye to yet another great group of seniors who blessed me considerably over their 4 years at school. I have also been swamped with driver's ed, spending some days from 7:30 am - 9:30 pm at school working in both classroom and driving settings. We also had a very busy start to June...my wife, mother and middle daughter celebrated birthdays, my wife and I celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary and my oldest daughter is just two weeks away from finishing kindergarten. BUSY, BUSY, BUSY, but such is my life.
Now, to the business at hand! Since my last challenge, "21 Days of Full Disclosure", I have done quite a good job of maintaining my weight without gaining an excessive amount in the past 2 1/2 months. On the other hand, I have not done a great job at losing anymore weight either. About a month ago, I established new goals for myself and I have been trying to meet those goals as much as possible, but the initial excitement surrounding those goals faded rather quickly and I have not been trying as wholeheartedly as I should be to meet the goals I established for myself. In a recent session with Dr. Wynns, we decided that I do the best when I am faced with a singular challenge that combines a specific goal, exciting ideas and some accountability. Following that session, Dr. Wynns gave me the assignment of establishing a new challenge for myself designed around the official SUMMER season. I have researched it and summer technically begins tomorrow, 6/21/11 and ends on 9/23/11. This time frame gives me approximately a three month challenge window to excel and achieve some of the goals I have had established for some time now. The assignment was to design a challenge that would focus on exercise, meal planning and accountability. I had to plan something that I could sustain for three months and that would utilize the blog as a way to keep others informed of my progress. I was racking my brain trying to come up with an idea when my amazing wife presented me with a great gift on our anniversary. I have wanted for some time now to get a weight/calorie management system that would keep track of my metabolic functions, such as calories burned, steps taken, sleep patterns, rates of activity and allow me to plug in my calories eaten during the day. The system helps you manage the various aspects of life that are essential for sustained weight loss. It also acts as a reminder that you can't be slack and hope to make a difference in your life. My wonderful wife made this desire a reality when she gave me a "BodyMedia FIT Armband" system.
This system is great and it gave me the vehicle to design my summer challenge. I have decided to do The "BodyMedia" Summer Challenge. The system comes with 3 months free website use of the support system. (You then sign up for a certain amount of subscription time. I chose the 12 month plan, because you save money with the longer plan activation.) So, during the 3 month summer season, I am going to track my food intake, exercise program, caloric deficit and sleep patterns in hopes of meeting the goal of reaching 250 pounds by 9/23/11. Each Monday, I will post a week in review, which will chronicle my total caloric deficit, exercise totals, sleep percentages, total step counts, activity levels, as well as, a general review of my week including interesting health ideas I come across. I would also like to create a discussion forum on the posts for anyone who would like to talk about a specific topic I post, or just share victories or concerns in your own lives. I am beginning to get a clearer picture for this blog and I want it to be more interactive. I really would like to get your opinions, suggestions and ideas on various topics that concern/excite me. By opening a dialogue, I feel we can all benefit from this challenge and assist each other along this journey. Thanks again for your patience with my lengthy absence and remember to look for the first "Week in Review" next Monday.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
THE HURT LOCKER
In 2009, The Hurt Locker was released in American theaters to rave reviews. The compelling story of an United States Army Explosive Ordnance Disposal (EOD) team working to clear Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs) in Iraq was so intriguing and well received that it was awarded the Oscar for Best Picture of the Year. The movie follows a group of soldiers whose job places them in high-risk and extremely perilous situations. These men worked in the most stressful conditions imaginable with no concern for themselves, but were dedicated to the safety and well-being of others. The title of the movie is taken from the large protective outfit worn by the squad member whose job it is to disarm the bombs once they have been located. It is with utmost respect and thanksgiving that I honor these soldiers in the metaphor I am about to present.....
I have never served in the military. I have never faced an enemy who is determined to kill me before I kill him. I have never been called upon to leave my family at a moment's notice to go around the world to protect the freedoms that I so humbly cherish. I have never faced that kind of enemy....but I have been that enemy. Of course, I am not an enemy to the freedoms of this country or its people, but in my own life I have caused pain, frustration and placed people I love in situations that are wrought with emotional IEDs! The number one target of many of these IED attacks has been my loving and devoted wife. Let me make a quick aside to this point of discussion...it was not until recently that I even realized or recognized that my actions were creating these various situations within my relationship. I, of course, had been quite ignorant to the fact that my own emotional roller coaster was affecting others. In recent weeks, I have started to look outside of my own little bubble and actually see the amazing people in my life that have quietly and bravely lived through many tense moments. In the midst of the various episodes I viewed as being the end all, be all of importance, my wife stood by me with love and support. Each time I "raged against the machine" and complained about how wounded I was and how no one truly realized what I was going through, she suited up. The times when my anger took over and I lashed out at the world that most certainly was against me, my wife approached the hidden explosive, wrapped her arms around it and held on in hopes that her love and concern would be enough to diffuse the situation. Most of the time, her knowledge and skill led her to success and yet, on occasion, even her superior knowledge was not enough to overcome the nature of the BOMB! It was on these occasions that my wife truly exemplified the essence of Walking in Love towards others. No matter how many times I had emotional eruptions, no matter how many times I wavered on what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be, no matter how many times I blamed everything under the sun for my displeasure and disillusionment....she was there. She bore the brunt of the shrapnel and just stayed...arms firmly wrapped around me...repeating to me that I was "God's Best" and that I was "Completely, Complete" and that I should view myself the way God views me. She withstood all the sadness, all the pain, all the frustration, all the ignorance, all the baggage, everything I threw at her and she did it without complaint! She stood firmly beside me while I took the time I needed to figure out exactly what was at the root of my unhappiness and when I began to come out of the shadows, she was still there! We have all heard the old saying that the people we hurt the most are the people we love! I see that now. I know that my wife withstood the hardships and never wavered in her love for me. Now, The first thing she will say about reading this post is that the things I have described made up only a small portion of the life we have shared over the past 15 years. She will point out all of the happy times and the abundance of blessings that we have enjoyed and look at the difficult moments as drops in the bucket of a life filled with joy and excitement and she would be correct. Our life together has been and continues to be incredibly blessed. We share a wonderful home with 3 amazingly beautiful and talented children. We laugh together often and love each other deeply. Today, I am healthy enough and strong enough to acknowledge my shortcomings and seek forgiveness for those actions that have caused others to feel sorrow, stress and pain. Today, I am brave enough to talk about the realities of myself that have been hidden in many ways from others. Today, I am humble enough to accept myself for who I am and strive to continue working on who I can be. Today I am blessed to be a Son of God and to share in all the abundance that comes with that and today, I am lucky enough to be married to my best friend, my greatest cheerleader and one of the most amazing women I know. T...I love you a Circle! Thanks for never giving up on me! I pray that the remainder of our life together is filled with continued abundance and is free of any further IEDs....but, I know if one of those horrible little hidden devices is found in the future, you will climb right back in that HURT LOCKER and face the challenge...because that is who you are and that is why the people you love are so thoroughly blessed to have you on their side and in their lives!
I have never served in the military. I have never faced an enemy who is determined to kill me before I kill him. I have never been called upon to leave my family at a moment's notice to go around the world to protect the freedoms that I so humbly cherish. I have never faced that kind of enemy....but I have been that enemy. Of course, I am not an enemy to the freedoms of this country or its people, but in my own life I have caused pain, frustration and placed people I love in situations that are wrought with emotional IEDs! The number one target of many of these IED attacks has been my loving and devoted wife. Let me make a quick aside to this point of discussion...it was not until recently that I even realized or recognized that my actions were creating these various situations within my relationship. I, of course, had been quite ignorant to the fact that my own emotional roller coaster was affecting others. In recent weeks, I have started to look outside of my own little bubble and actually see the amazing people in my life that have quietly and bravely lived through many tense moments. In the midst of the various episodes I viewed as being the end all, be all of importance, my wife stood by me with love and support. Each time I "raged against the machine" and complained about how wounded I was and how no one truly realized what I was going through, she suited up. The times when my anger took over and I lashed out at the world that most certainly was against me, my wife approached the hidden explosive, wrapped her arms around it and held on in hopes that her love and concern would be enough to diffuse the situation. Most of the time, her knowledge and skill led her to success and yet, on occasion, even her superior knowledge was not enough to overcome the nature of the BOMB! It was on these occasions that my wife truly exemplified the essence of Walking in Love towards others. No matter how many times I had emotional eruptions, no matter how many times I wavered on what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be, no matter how many times I blamed everything under the sun for my displeasure and disillusionment....she was there. She bore the brunt of the shrapnel and just stayed...arms firmly wrapped around me...repeating to me that I was "God's Best" and that I was "Completely, Complete" and that I should view myself the way God views me. She withstood all the sadness, all the pain, all the frustration, all the ignorance, all the baggage, everything I threw at her and she did it without complaint! She stood firmly beside me while I took the time I needed to figure out exactly what was at the root of my unhappiness and when I began to come out of the shadows, she was still there! We have all heard the old saying that the people we hurt the most are the people we love! I see that now. I know that my wife withstood the hardships and never wavered in her love for me. Now, The first thing she will say about reading this post is that the things I have described made up only a small portion of the life we have shared over the past 15 years. She will point out all of the happy times and the abundance of blessings that we have enjoyed and look at the difficult moments as drops in the bucket of a life filled with joy and excitement and she would be correct. Our life together has been and continues to be incredibly blessed. We share a wonderful home with 3 amazingly beautiful and talented children. We laugh together often and love each other deeply. Today, I am healthy enough and strong enough to acknowledge my shortcomings and seek forgiveness for those actions that have caused others to feel sorrow, stress and pain. Today, I am brave enough to talk about the realities of myself that have been hidden in many ways from others. Today, I am humble enough to accept myself for who I am and strive to continue working on who I can be. Today I am blessed to be a Son of God and to share in all the abundance that comes with that and today, I am lucky enough to be married to my best friend, my greatest cheerleader and one of the most amazing women I know. T...I love you a Circle! Thanks for never giving up on me! I pray that the remainder of our life together is filled with continued abundance and is free of any further IEDs....but, I know if one of those horrible little hidden devices is found in the future, you will climb right back in that HURT LOCKER and face the challenge...because that is who you are and that is why the people you love are so thoroughly blessed to have you on their side and in their lives!
Monday, May 16, 2011
Setting Goals.....
Unfortunately, my hiatus from the blog was a little longer than I expected. I have realized in the past couple of weeks that I am a very goal driven individual. When I set a tangible goal, I tend to keep a much stronger focus on that goal and consequently my success rate is much higher. During my 21 days of focused food logging, I accomplished a great deal. I lost 22 pounds, fell below 300 for the first time in years and came to some pretty amazing realizations. Since then, I have found myself in a similar pattern of floundering around, making a bunch of excuses and holding pretty steady on the weight front. The past cycle of set goal, work to reach goal, reach goal, become satisfied, turn satisfaction into laziness, turn laziness into excuses, use excuses to avoid further goal setting and accomplishments has been in full effect. For the last 3 weeks, I have been sitting around, enjoying my success and convincing myself that everything has changed....and you know how the saying goes, "the more things change, the more they stay the same!" Today I am finally making an effort to move beyond the "glory" of my previous triumph and push past this wall of excuses to begin what I am calling ROUND 3! In ROUND 1, I came to grips with the reality that I needed to seriously do something with my life to try and prolong it as much as I possibly can...Presto, the blog was born. In ROUND 2, I set a goal to fall below 300 pounds during a strenuous and detailed look at my eating habits...Mission Accomplished. As I step back into the ring for ROUND 3, I will confront the endless excuses that I have continued to make throughout my life and fight back with a series of small, attainable goals that I hope will keep me going for a lot longer than in the past. I have broken these goals into 4 categories and will share them with everyone here on this post. Along with my goals, I have also established some rewards for myself to act as a bridge between milestones that will allow me the opportunity to celebrate my accomplishment, without derailing my determination to forge ahead. As always, your prayers, support and love will be most helpful in this next ROUND. I know at times I have been inconsistent, but I am still fighting and this is a fight I intend to win!
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GOALS
Daily: Keep Food Log, Workout (including a 1-2 mile run), Help around the House, Read with the Kids, Play with the Kids, Talk with my Wife, Read Bible, BLOG, Facebook a Friend.
Weekly: Workout 5 out of 7 days, Lose 2 - 4 pounds, Keep Food Log 6 out of 7 days, Blog 3-5 times, Call Family, Call Friends, Write a Letter, Mow Grass and do Yard Work, Contact Former Students.
Monthly: Write for a possible Book, Lose 15 - 20 pounds, Take my Wife on a Date, Take each of My Kids Out Individually at Least Once, Workout 20 out of 30 days, Blog 12 - 20 times, Read 1 - 2 Books, Have Friends over for Dinner.
Yearly: Get a Physical, Run (2) 5K races, Lose 100 - 110 pounds, Read 15 - 25 Books, Complete a Home Improvement Project, Travel with My Family, Visit Family, Complete a Draft of a Book.
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REWARDS
* Download (1) iTunes track per (2) pounds lost
* Take a fishing day or play a round of golf per (20) pounds lost
* Purchase a Calorie Management System when I reach (250) pounds
* Go to a choice sporting event (i.e. baseball, football, hockey, etc...) per (60) pounds lost
* Go to the Biggest Loser Ranch for a week after (85) pounds lost
* Take a weekend trip with my Wife to NEW YORK after breaking (200) pounds
* Chaperon a School Trip to Europe once I reach my goal weight of (185) pounds
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COMING SOON:
(A Glance at Future Posts)
The Hurt Locker
21 Days of Revelation: Part 1 (Physical Healing)
21 Days of Revelation: Part 2 (Financial Healing)
21 Days of Revelation: Part 3 (Emotional Healing)
Beyond the 21 Days: Forgiveness and Love
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GOALS
Daily: Keep Food Log, Workout (including a 1-2 mile run), Help around the House, Read with the Kids, Play with the Kids, Talk with my Wife, Read Bible, BLOG, Facebook a Friend.
Weekly: Workout 5 out of 7 days, Lose 2 - 4 pounds, Keep Food Log 6 out of 7 days, Blog 3-5 times, Call Family, Call Friends, Write a Letter, Mow Grass and do Yard Work, Contact Former Students.
Monthly: Write for a possible Book, Lose 15 - 20 pounds, Take my Wife on a Date, Take each of My Kids Out Individually at Least Once, Workout 20 out of 30 days, Blog 12 - 20 times, Read 1 - 2 Books, Have Friends over for Dinner.
Yearly: Get a Physical, Run (2) 5K races, Lose 100 - 110 pounds, Read 15 - 25 Books, Complete a Home Improvement Project, Travel with My Family, Visit Family, Complete a Draft of a Book.
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REWARDS
* Download (1) iTunes track per (2) pounds lost
* Take a fishing day or play a round of golf per (20) pounds lost
* Purchase a Calorie Management System when I reach (250) pounds
* Go to a choice sporting event (i.e. baseball, football, hockey, etc...) per (60) pounds lost
* Go to the Biggest Loser Ranch for a week after (85) pounds lost
* Take a weekend trip with my Wife to NEW YORK after breaking (200) pounds
* Chaperon a School Trip to Europe once I reach my goal weight of (185) pounds
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COMING SOON:
(A Glance at Future Posts)
The Hurt Locker
21 Days of Revelation: Part 1 (Physical Healing)
21 Days of Revelation: Part 2 (Financial Healing)
21 Days of Revelation: Part 3 (Emotional Healing)
Beyond the 21 Days: Forgiveness and Love
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Thanks Mom...I Love You!
This past weekend, to kick off our Spring Break vacation, I loaded up the van and headed south with my wife and 3 kids to visit Grandma and the gang. Now, to give you an idea of how my family is situated, my Mom and her husband live approximately 1000 steps from my older brother and his family, another 500 steps from my twin brother and his family and about 1/2 mile from my older sister and her family. Needless to say, our family is what you might call CLOSE! Taking the trip down to the beach to spend the weekend is a wonderful opportunity for my children to see 10 of their cousins, their aunts and uncles and to hang out with Grandma and Grandpa. Our visit this year was great! We spent four wonderful days hanging out with family, riding the ferry, visiting the Aquarium, fishing in the lake and sharing many meals together. It is such a blessing as a father to see my kids enjoy the town in which I grew up. I love those moments when I can share a bit of my childhood with my kids. One of the biggest treats this year was the effort my Mom made to make healthy, whole grain snacks and fresh fruit available while we visited. Now growing up, my family would not have been confused with health food activists. Don't get me wrong, vegetables were readily available, but so were lots of sugary snacks, soft drinks and traditional "Southern Fried" fare. Our culinary world was very typical of a 1980's southern family. These days my Mom does a much better job of watching what she eats and prepares, but Sun Drop and other guilty pleasures are hard habits to break. In the past I headed south with the knowledge that I would eat what was available and enjoy the company of my family, however, like I said earlier, Mom had a surprise in store. This trip, we enjoyed grilled meats and veggies, whole wheat pasta, fresh fruit, multi-grain snacks, no sugar added ice cream cones (snack size), turkey bacon, roast with carrots and potatoes and many other wonderfully healthy treats. The one time we did indulge in a guilty pleasure was on the final day of our visit when we went to lunch at a local Mexican Restaurant that serves exceptional cuisine. I ordered my meal, consumed half of it, boxed the rest up and left it in the fridge when we headed home. What a great trip and what a wonderfully caring and loving Mom I am so blessed to have. Thanks Mom for the effort you make to provide me with healthy options that fit with my new life choice. Thanks for always loving me with no strings attached and for being there to pick me up and dust me off when life threw me a challenge I found difficult to overcome. Thanks for sharing movie nights, phone calls, tears, laughter, joy and sorrow over the years. Thanks for being proud of me and the person I have become. Thanks for helping make me the man I am today and thanks for being a shining example of the love of God here on earth. You are...to borrow your favorite word....an "AWESOME" Mom and words cannot do justice to the love I feel for you in the depths of my soul. I am so blessed to call you my Mom and so honored to call you my friend. I LOVE YOU ALL THE WAY TO THE MOON AND BACK!
Under 300....
Sorry for the recent absence from writing....the past couple of weeks have been filled with tennis matches, school trips and Spring Break vacations. As I posted in the FINAL WRAP UP, I lost 19 lbs during my 21 days of disclosure. It was such a motivating time and one filled with incredible revelations for me as an individual. I plan on creating a separate post about that at a later date. For this post, I want to focus on something equally as motivating and encouraging and something that I have yearned for and desired now for over 2 years. As of Friday, 4-8-2011, I am no longer in the 300 club. When I weighed that morning, I came in at 298 lbs, bringing my 28 day weight loss total to 22 lbs and moving me under 300 pounds for the first time since March of 2009. It was such a relief and exciting moment to get on the scales and not see a three at the beginning of the flashing red digits. Thanks for all the support and well wishes over the past month. Hopefully, this is just the beginning and I can stay focused on reaching my goal of weighing 250 lbs by July when my family and I take our annual beach trip, So long 300....I don't plan on visiting you again anytime soon!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
THE FINAL WRAP-UP!
On Saturday, 3/11/2011, I began a 21 day odyssey of tracking and reporting the food I was eating. During that time I focused on watching and calculating certain amounts of specific nutritional standards each day. Some days I did extremely well and others I could have done a lot better. I tried to open myself to the vulnerability of what I was doing and for the most part achieved that during the last three weeks. In all honesty, there were a couple of moments when I did falter and make a choice that was not the best (i.e. a KitKat candy bar or two), which at the time I did not "fully disclose" and for that I apologize. I realize that there are still some lingering issues I face with being completely open about the food I eat and I must strive to work harder and not allow embarrassment or shame to affect me in my honesty. Outside of the candy bars, everything that went into my body was documented and shared. Even though I did fall short on a couple of occasions, the accountability and desire to be as honest as possible, did get me through several other moments of weakness when old habits began to creep in and push me off of my path. The only issue I feel guilty about is not sharing those weak moments earlier. I still have these feelings of needing to be perfect and not letting others down because of my poor decisions. I know that is the main thing I still need to work on and I hope that I will continue to make progress toward becoming stronger. The one positive out of those poor decisions and one thing that should have allowed me to be more open, is that on the days I did slip up and eat something that was not the best choice, those were the days when I was low on my calories and fat and could have easily fit the candy into the daily totals and been OK. The stigma of "oh no, I ate the candy", which has been bred in many over eaters who try to "be good" and "stay strong" just devoured my psyche and put up a mental wall that I chose not to break down. It is one of those by-products of a life filled with "dieting" and "weight roller coasters" that seems to always be lurking in the back of my mind. So, there is a truer sense of "Full Disclosure" and it is something that frees me now to be able to share the results of the past 3 weeks.
When I began 3 weeks ago, I weighed 320 lbs. By watching what I ate, limiting my poor choices and exercising (even just a little), I now weigh............
301 lbs
That's right....I lost 19 pounds in 21 days. It is an amazing feeling! Just knowing that I was able to lose that kind of weight by basically watching and charting what I ate is so encouraging. I worked out some, but not as much as I should and I still faltered on occasion with the rogue candy bar here and there and yet I lost 6% of my total weight and now stand on the doorstep of something that has not been a part of my life in a few years...the 200s! I want to thank everyone who supported me during the 21 Days of Full Disclosure...henceforth known as the 21 Days of Semi-Full Disclosure and who continue to support me in every choice I make in life. I am still keeping my journal and still maintaining my goals each day. I will continue to try and make exercise a more significant part of my day and will also continue to work on breaking the habit of hiding choices that embarrass me. I will also continue posting to the blog with regularity and tracking my success into the future. Thanks again everyone......and do not fear.....you have not heard the last of me!
When I began 3 weeks ago, I weighed 320 lbs. By watching what I ate, limiting my poor choices and exercising (even just a little), I now weigh............
301 lbs
That's right....I lost 19 pounds in 21 days. It is an amazing feeling! Just knowing that I was able to lose that kind of weight by basically watching and charting what I ate is so encouraging. I worked out some, but not as much as I should and I still faltered on occasion with the rogue candy bar here and there and yet I lost 6% of my total weight and now stand on the doorstep of something that has not been a part of my life in a few years...the 200s! I want to thank everyone who supported me during the 21 Days of Full Disclosure...henceforth known as the 21 Days of Semi-Full Disclosure and who continue to support me in every choice I make in life. I am still keeping my journal and still maintaining my goals each day. I will continue to try and make exercise a more significant part of my day and will also continue to work on breaking the habit of hiding choices that embarrass me. I will also continue posting to the blog with regularity and tracking my success into the future. Thanks again everyone......and do not fear.....you have not heard the last of me!
Full Disclosure: Entry #21 (Friday 4/1/2011)
Day #21....It All Comes Down to This!
Food Log:
Breakfast: PowerBar Energy Bar. (250 calories, 5 fat, 2.5 sat. fat, 10 protein, 5 fiber )
Lunch: Chicken Sandwich w/ Pretzels, Apple. (655 calories, 11 fat, 3.5 sat. fat, 44 protein, 6 fiber)
Dinner: 2 cups of Tracey's Veggie Bean Soup, Turkey Grilled Cheese Sandwich. (556 calories, 11.1 fat, 4.6 sat. fat, 37.2 protein, 10.2 fiber)
Snacks: 5 Organic Ginger Snap Cookies (130 calories, 3.5 fat, 0 sat. fat, 1 protein, 0 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1591 calories, 30.6 fat, 10.6 sat. fat, 92.2 protein, 21.2 fiber
Water: 82 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: All will be revealed in the FINAL WRAP-UP!
Food Log:
Breakfast: PowerBar Energy Bar. (250 calories, 5 fat, 2.5 sat. fat, 10 protein, 5 fiber )
Lunch: Chicken Sandwich w/ Pretzels, Apple. (655 calories, 11 fat, 3.5 sat. fat, 44 protein, 6 fiber)
Dinner: 2 cups of Tracey's Veggie Bean Soup, Turkey Grilled Cheese Sandwich. (556 calories, 11.1 fat, 4.6 sat. fat, 37.2 protein, 10.2 fiber)
Snacks: 5 Organic Ginger Snap Cookies (130 calories, 3.5 fat, 0 sat. fat, 1 protein, 0 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1591 calories, 30.6 fat, 10.6 sat. fat, 92.2 protein, 21.2 fiber
Water: 82 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: All will be revealed in the FINAL WRAP-UP!
Full Disclosure: Entry #20 (Thursday 3/31/2011)
Day #20....The Eve of the End!
Food Log:
Breakfast: FiberOne Bar. (140 calories, 3.5 fat, 1.5 sat. fat, 2 protein, 9 fiber )
Lunch: SmartOnes Salisbury Steak. (280 calories, 9 fat, 3.5 sat. fat, 18 protein, 3 fiber)
Dinner: Broiled Salmon, Sauteed Beans, Red Potatoes, Corn on the Cob, Sauteed Onions. (653 calories, 8.5 fat, 1 sat. fat, 58 protein, 12 fiber)
Snacks: Turkey Sandwich w/ Pretzels, 5 Organic Ginger Snap Cookies (662 calories, 12.5 fat, 1.5 sat. fat, 42.5 protein, 2.5 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1735 calories, 33.5 fat, 7.5 sat. fat, 120.5 protein, 26.5 fiber
Water: 92 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: Well, tomorrow is the final day of this 3 week trial. I am hoping to see great success and that this will be just the beginning of a future filled with better choices and a healthier lifestyle. The past 20 days have been challenging and rewarding....the proof will be in the proverbial pudding!
Food Log:
Breakfast: FiberOne Bar. (140 calories, 3.5 fat, 1.5 sat. fat, 2 protein, 9 fiber )
Lunch: SmartOnes Salisbury Steak. (280 calories, 9 fat, 3.5 sat. fat, 18 protein, 3 fiber)
Dinner: Broiled Salmon, Sauteed Beans, Red Potatoes, Corn on the Cob, Sauteed Onions. (653 calories, 8.5 fat, 1 sat. fat, 58 protein, 12 fiber)
Snacks: Turkey Sandwich w/ Pretzels, 5 Organic Ginger Snap Cookies (662 calories, 12.5 fat, 1.5 sat. fat, 42.5 protein, 2.5 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1735 calories, 33.5 fat, 7.5 sat. fat, 120.5 protein, 26.5 fiber
Water: 92 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: Well, tomorrow is the final day of this 3 week trial. I am hoping to see great success and that this will be just the beginning of a future filled with better choices and a healthier lifestyle. The past 20 days have been challenging and rewarding....the proof will be in the proverbial pudding!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Full Disclosure: Entry #19 (Wednesday 3/30/2011)
Day #19....A very busy day...one step closer to the finish line!
Food Log:
Breakfast: Kashi Trail Mix Bar. (140 calories, 5 fat, .5 sat. fat, 6 protein, 4 fiber )
Lunch: SmartOnes Creamy Rigatoni w/ Broccoli and Chicken. (280 calories, 5 fat, 2.5 sat. fat, 19 protein, 3 fiber)
Dinner: 6 oz. Jenni-O Turkey Smoked Sausage, 1 cup Brown Rice, 1 cup Teriyaki Veggies. (580 calories, 10 fat, 4.5 sat. fat, 34 protein, 7 fiber)
Snacks: Baked Tostitos w/ Salsa, PowerBar Energy Bar (310 calories, 7.5 fat, 2.75 sat. fat, 14 protein, 7 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1310 calories, 27.5 fat, 10.25 sat. fat, 74 protein, 21 fiber
Water: 92 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: I have decided that Salsa is a wonderfully versatile condiment. It is low in calories and fat, it adds a nice spicy flavor to your food and it can transform normal everyday meals into something a little more exciting. I think I am going to use it more often in my cooking in the future!
Food Log:
Breakfast: Kashi Trail Mix Bar. (140 calories, 5 fat, .5 sat. fat, 6 protein, 4 fiber )
Lunch: SmartOnes Creamy Rigatoni w/ Broccoli and Chicken. (280 calories, 5 fat, 2.5 sat. fat, 19 protein, 3 fiber)
Dinner: 6 oz. Jenni-O Turkey Smoked Sausage, 1 cup Brown Rice, 1 cup Teriyaki Veggies. (580 calories, 10 fat, 4.5 sat. fat, 34 protein, 7 fiber)
Snacks: Baked Tostitos w/ Salsa, PowerBar Energy Bar (310 calories, 7.5 fat, 2.75 sat. fat, 14 protein, 7 fiber)
Total Nutritional Data: 1310 calories, 27.5 fat, 10.25 sat. fat, 74 protein, 21 fiber
Water: 92 oz.
Exercise: N/A
Wrap Up: I have decided that Salsa is a wonderfully versatile condiment. It is low in calories and fat, it adds a nice spicy flavor to your food and it can transform normal everyday meals into something a little more exciting. I think I am going to use it more often in my cooking in the future!
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