Sunday, December 19, 2010

Death of a Vegetarian!

On June 1st of this year I approached my wife about the idea of becoming a vegetarian! (let me note that I was an "ovolactopescatarian", which means I still consumed eggs, milk and fish)  I was determined that this would be the answer to my weight loss issues.  As we began this life change I was fully engaged.  I read books about being a vegetarian. I looked up tons of vegetarian recipes. I truly embraced the lifestyle and actually enjoyed it.  I really did not miss the meat that I had grown so accustomed to in my diet.  For three months I diligently stuck to the meatless plan and could tell a difference in my energy and all around well-being. THEN.....the journey down the vegetarian highway was brought to an abrupt end as I was faced with the inevitable challenge of....GUYS FANTASY FOOTBALL WEEKEND!  I knew going into the weekend that I was facing a stiff obstacle.  10 guys at a hunting lodge, preparing for the start of the greatest season in the world, surrounded by nature, charcoal and beautiful pieces of red meat...WHAT WAS A NEWLY CONVERTED VEGETARIAN TO DO?  The remnants of the rather large steak that found its way down my throat answered that question. I had caved, given in to my "neanderthal" desires and turned from the vegetarian lifestyle that I had grown to enjoy.  The big question I asked myself was.....WHY?  I mean, I really liked being a vegetarian.  My friends are great guys and outside of the occasional harmless ribbing, would never ask me to do something I didn't choose to do....and that is what happened...I chose to eat the steak!  I also chose to eat the buffalo chicken dip, the hot dogs, the potato chips, and the various other goodies adorning the buffet table.  The ridiculous thing is, I had actually brought a nice array of vegetables and a wonderful piece of salmon with me for the weekend and yet I still caved.  Contemplating this decision and the many other decisions I had made throughout my life that dealt with food led me to the conclusion that I am a very poor "social eater".  When I am alone in my "fortress of solitude", I can control myself beautifully, however, as soon as I get around others I find the most convincing rationalizations to allow myself to deviate from my path.  Case in point...Friday night at a holiday party with my colleagues, I was faced with a simple decision to consume a piece of 1/2 red velvet and 1/2 cheesecake.  A simple "no" would have been the easiest thing to do, but instead I said "thank you" and ate the whole damn thing.  Again I say, WHY?  How can an intelligent, college educated and knowledgeable person make such poor decisions?  The answer I came up with is that patterns that have been ingrained in me since I was young, continue to emerge whenever I find myself in such social situations.  My inability to make smart choices is not out of ignorance, it is out of habit!  Breaking the habit of overeating is a very challenging endeavor and one I intend to finally achieve.  I know I have it within myself to be strong and to rediscover that inner "vegetarian" who faced the criticisms and still maintained a healthy "food focus" for a good amount of time.  Maybe it is time to bring that person back to life...a little resuscitation if you will!  Maybe this time I'll remember that my well-being is far greater than any food that passes over my lips!  Maybe this new found independence will finally break the 30+ year strangle hold my habits have held over me!  Maybe this time I can truly make it happen! 

You know what....forget MAYBE.......     

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